Saying yes to opportunities, professionally or personally, can lead to some adventures you’ll never forget, or an opportunity to push your comfort zone and learn something new.
Sometimes though, it’s important to say no – working on a priority where you need to focus your creative juices, or holding space for family or self-care. If you’re like me, saying no can sometimes feel like hurling yourself off a precipice into the unknown – will they be angry? Will this burn a bridge I’ll regret? Will there be NO RETURN? (Spoiler: no.)
I’m always glad I declined something if there was a reason not to – even if it was simply a feeling. Especially if I can do so in a way that feels honest and explains the why behind my decision.
Recently, an interview I read with Ashley C. Ford that succinctly brought together some reminders about saying no, as well as how to do it gracefully. Here’s what stuck with me most:
Be kind – just because you’re saying no doesn’t mean you have to be rude or cold
Being honest is better for everyone to avoid frustration and false expectations
Be clear on your priority/goals, and use that as a guiderail to be able to say no to things that aren’t working toward that, or don’t serve that
Turns of phrase I have already used when struggling with the right way to say no:
I’m sorry. I don’t have the bandwidth for this. (So simple. So honest.)
This is an amazing opportunity. I hope you’ll keep me in mind for something in the future, but if I do this, I want to do it 100% and there’s no way I would be able to give you 100% right now. Or…
I want to do the best possible work for my clients that I’m wildly proud of. Right now I don’t have the capacity to give you that high quality collaboration.
I can work on this, but I’ll have to let go of this other project. Which do you want me to prioritize?
Do you have guidelines for how to choose what to say yes or no to? How do you say no in a way that feels authentic and with integrity?
Once again, thank you from my heart and soul for your support, great senses of humor, brilliant minds, collaboration and what you're each doing to make the world a better place.
Cheers,
Where in the Virtual World is ConverSketch?
Climate Change, Media, & Kids: A few weeks ago, I had the great pleasure of supporting a workshop hosted by NSF about how to leverage media platforms to tell stories and educate children on climate change. It was AWESOME and I can’t wait to see where this goes!
ShapingEDU Pente Challenge: ShapingEDU was back for another innovative virtual event – a pitch challenge for teams working to improve the future of education in the digital age…with real cash as the prize! I got to support teams as they practiced “yes, and…” improv thinking for their pitches, and was an expert resource to help them create custom visuals for the pitch or work through complexity. I love that ShapingEDU always includes student voices!
Arizona HIV/AIDS Leadership Academy: Another cohort wrapped up by reflecting on leadership values and key takeaways to be better leaders working to End the Epidemic. I’m always floored by the vulnerability and support the facilitators hold for each cohort.
